Memes & Friends
- Feb 21, 2021
- 5 min read

專訪06 脂脂肪 Gigi Fong #我的愛自己是狠狠做自己

Updated: Nov 10, 2021

To love myself is to always be myself.

Q1.愛自己的定義

Loving myself means…

愛自己就是狠狠做自己，做自己喜歡的事。

我渴望自由，因為我相信當我們靈魂深處有很想做的事情，就該不惜一切地去做！

Loving myself is to always be myself. Doing things I like to do.

I long for freedom, and we should try our damnedest when we find our true calling from deep within!

社會會告訴我們很多事情，甚麼是美、甚麼是醜、甚麼是女生／男生該有的模樣、甚麼是成功、甚麼是失敗。

Society tells us many things: what is beauty, what is ugliness, what a girl/boy should look like, what is success, and what is failure.

但愛自己，就是拋開這一切世俗的標準，欣賞自己獨一無二的存在，聆聽自己靈魂深處的聲音，自在地做自己。世界不會圍著你一個人轉，但這不代表你需要圍著世界轉。

But you must set aside these worldly standards if you are to love yourself. Learn to appreciate your unique existence. Find your inner voice and listen to it. Be carefree. The world does not revolve around you, but it doesn’t mean you need to revolve around it.

當你狠狠做自己，同類會自然向你靠近。相反，當你刻意去迎合社會的標準，即使身處所謂的主流，你也會無比孤單。

When you are able to be yourself, you’ll find like-minded people naturally gravitating towards you. On the other hand, when you try to fit in according to the standards of society, even if you become a part of the so-called mainstream, you’ll find yourself extremely lonely.

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Q2. 不愛自己的狀態

Not loving myself is...

當你被社會公式化的框框限制了自己，無法擺脫和他人比較的心癮，過於著重別人對自己的評價，永遠看不見自己的好，永遠覺得自己不夠：身材不夠好、樣貌不夠好、社會地位不夠高、錢不夠、學歷不夠、朋友不夠多、成就不夠耀眼等等。

When you become a prisoner of social constructs, you’ll never escape the addiction of comparing yourself with others. You’ll fixate on how others think of you and never see your own strengths. Feeling inadequate, you’ll never be satisfied with your physique, your looks, your social standing, the size of your bank account, your level of education, the amount of friends you have, your level of achievements, etc.

這個「不夠」的心態會影響你生活的每個部分，無論是工作、戀愛、交友，你會不斷透過勉強自己、扭曲自己爭取更多人的關注、欣賞和愛，但往往只會令自己活得愈來愈不像自己。

This mentality of “not enough” affects every aspect of life, whether it’s at work, romance, or making friends. You will continually force yourself to conform and seek others’ attention, appreciation and approval. In the end, you’re just becoming less and less like yourself.

Q3. 愛自己的生活模式

The lifestyle of loving myself...

在2020年2月一個無聊的下午。我看著Netflix電視倒影中的自己，在沙發上肆無忌憚地展露肚腩、雙下巴、撩鼻屎、狂吃零食，隨手打開手機裡的Instagram，超記得我是看見水原希子的一條影片，超瘦的手臂、腰圍，一股「你永遠都無法變成這樣」的壓力襲來，當下決定馬上unfollow。（其實她沒有做錯甚麼，只是那是當下最能即時減輕壓力的方法。）

It was a boring afternoon in February 2020. I was watching Netfilx when I noticed my own reflection on the television - lounging on my couch with my belly hanging, double chin visible, nose picking, all the while with my hand in the snack bowl. I grabbed my phone to log on to Instagram and distinctly remember the video I saw of Kiko Mizuhara. That self-conscious feeling I had from seeing her super skinny arms and waist was so strong, and I thought “You are never going to look like that.” I immediately unfollowed. (She didn't do anything wrong to be fair, but that was the best way to relieve my immediate stress.)

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然後不知道哪來的動力讓我離開沙發，拿出畫畫用具，開始畫一個超胖的女人，自信、寫意地躺著，我發現我看著她不會有壓力，反而有一份喜悅和釋懷。這個超胖的女人，接著就成為了脂脂肪Gigi Fong。

I don’t know where I found the sudden motivation to leave that couch, but I took out my drawing tools and started to draw a super fat woman lying down confidently and freely. I found relief looking at her form and a sense of joy and comfort washed over me. That was the birth of Gigi Fong (“Gi Fong” means fat in Cantonese).

近年，接觸多了演藝圈裡的人，很多都為了上鏡好看都瘦得很，連身在幕後的我也時不時會被人叫我要減肥、削面骨什麼的，也有haters幫我改花名，可想而知有多少人正生活在這個「不能胖」的陰影下。每天聽太多「肥咗wor」、「殘咗wor」、「你咁樣點見人」、「你要點點點至有人鍾意」的話，實在令人愈來愈想把自己藏起來。

I have come into more contact with people in the entertainment industry in recent years, and being in front of the camera means they have to be super skinny. Even for someone like me who works behind the scenes, I get told from time to time that I should lose some weight or get my face done to look slimmer. I’ve even been called names by haters. It’s easy to imagine the amount of people in the industry who suffer from body image pressure. On a daily basis, I hear conversations of “You’ve gained a few pounds.”, “You’re looking worse for wear”, “How can you be in the company of others looking like that?”, “You’ve got to look this way or that way to be liked.” It makes me want to hide myself away the more I hear these comments.

創作脂脂肪後，我才發現當社會大眾對肥胖恐懼、厭惡，擁抱肥胖原來是一件帶來很多正能量的事情，而且大家其實都很喜歡自己最原本的樣子，那為甚麼不能狠狠做自己呢？

The creation of Gigi Fong made me realise embracing what you are can be such a positive thing. To hell with the stigma society has placed on weight issues. In reality, we all want to like ourselves for what we are, so why not be yourself?

於是這過去一年，我透過分享脂脂肪的畫作和文字，出版繪本《你說不對》和舉辦《脂脂肪的世界》原畫展，讓更多人有勇氣做自己、愛自己！

So through the drawings and musings of Gigi Fong in the past year, I published the picture book You Are Not Right 《你說不對》and also held a painting exhibition titled The World of Gigi Fong. I hope my work can inspire others to have the courage to be themselves and love themselves!