Updated: Nov 10, 2021
To love myself is to be selfish without being immoral.
Loving myself means…
The definition of loving oneself can be a very complex one. It can be taken literally or can be looked at conceptually. Conceptually, I think it means doing something or having a positive impact on one’s mind and body. I read a book by Ayn Rand titled The Virtue of Selfishness.
One famous quote from Rand reads, “No man can have a right to impose an unchose obligation, an unrewarded duty or an involuntary servitude on another man. There can be no such thing as “the right to enslave.” I believe her idea of selfishness is morally acceptable and a virtue.
For example, some say gains through the suffering of others is a form of selfishness. In reality, you’ve only made yourself a target of hate or might even be breaking the law. You only end up hurting yourself and that is not selfishness, that’s just stupidity.
For me, loving myself means I can make the best choices for myself and my behaviour without harming other people’s interests. In a nutshell, that means eating what I want to eat. Doing what I want to do. Care about people of my choice, etc. If I lose the will, and still can’t change my mind after some serious consideration, then don’t live. Don’t let others host you hostage emotionally, and likewise, don’t do it to others.
《自私的美徳 The Virtue of Selfishness: A New Concept of Egoism》
及其作者 安‧蘭德 Ayn Rand （網路圖片來源）
Not loving myself is...
Not realising your talent to the full extent. This makes me feel unworthy of love when it happens.
There was a period when I felt really lost. I was really hung up on getting noticed by other people. I didn’t know what I wanted for myself, or what was right for me. I scrambled in self protection mode like a cat in a bath. I was a real mess until I came upon Ayn Rand’s The Virtue of Selfishness. The things I came to realise...
A basic rule I now live by, “You must keep following your heart and live at your own pace, even if everything else seems bleak.”
The lifestyle of loving myself...
Having a good skincare routine to make myself feel good.
Cooking simple meals for myself when I’m in the right mood. Making fried eggs and eating fruits.
Treating myself to occasional shopping sprees at Don Don Donki.
Japanese variety shows.
Being able to create.
I’ve recently developed a liking for colouring my nails, but maybe it’s just me being attracted to the smell of acetone.
Run my florist business to the best of my abilities and try not to make too much of a loss.
Never leave home without my headphones. I need my songs and rhythm for the day.
Resist the temptation to become desensitised about what is right and wrong.
If there’s something within your reach that you want to do, go do it.
I still think I would like to spend a good portion of my remaining life living in Japan. I guess that would be the ultimate act of loving myself. It seems out of reach right now, but you can never say never with a bit of luck and a little preparation work on my part like first learning Japanese LOL.
執行編輯 Executive Editor: Moon Mo
助理編輯 Assistant Editor: Tina Lee
英文翻譯 English Translation: Cliff Wu
NEXT 下一篇 / 專訪01 Michelle Chan #我的愛自己是 忠於自己的節奏
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